I Am Content

My heart beats for you.
With every contraction of my heart muscle
Your name flows through my blood vessels
Cut me now and I bleed you

Etched on the deepest recesses of my mind,
Your name escapes my lips, subconsciously, I can’t help but let it slip
I meditate on your memory and flatter myself with potent vanity
That your smile was meant for me
I just may be going crazy but my memory is far from hazy.
The moments we shared together, so pure and simple, forever I shall remember.   

I am content.
That this is what was and will never be
Like a flash of lightning, we had a spark that flashed bright
But then it disappeared only to leave night
The hand that touched mine, platonic in intent,
Made my heart skip a beat and my breath rush in gasps through the vent of my lungs.
Yet it was not mine to hold
And you are not mine to love
I guess then, we were not meant to be


The Beauty of Redemption

Redemption. Defined as the action of saving or being saved from sin, error, or evil.

The world brims with agents of malpractice
Of pirates, plunderers and persistent wrongdoers.
There is no soul, no not one
To claim innocence for error all have done

Think of a toddler, wide eyed and pure
Radiant with youth, untainted and true.
Yet there comes a time the child will lie
The words of false from his mouth will fly
So easy it seems to come to this
The loss of truth, of joy and peace

Yes, all have sinned both great and small
None can stand free of brawl

But even in the dark corners of earth
There is light and hope of new birth
For in us we hold the power of pardon
To hold a brother in esteem once more
What a wondrous thing should man choose to live
Strolling down the path named ‘forgive’
Such bliss awaits for those who choose, to search foremost a state of truce
The patient embrace of the wise and loving
Whom comprehend the art of giving

For I have known that special touch
To be found free even when in guilt I plea
A mind bending witness of selfless act
My soul sings when I recall, the instance of love exact

Should we not all strive to be free,
Of the endless black we often see?
Together let’s aim for hearts of gold
That race to keep friends in a fiece hold


That smile that dances on your lips
Those hands that caress your hips
The joy that shines in your eyes
The warmth that encircles where you lie
That should have been mine

The plans you make to forever
The fingers that hold yours together
The memories you make each night
The words that make your heart take flight
Those should have been mine

The girl you become in his arms
The heart you hold in your palms
The time you spend in his embrace
The picture of you at his place
That should have been me

Looking for Distractions

The hardest thing about trying to forget someone is suppressing the memories. How do you stop thinking about someone when almost everything you encounter in life triggers one memory or another starring the very person you’re trying to forget?

For me, it’s certain songs that make me smile when I hear them because once upon a time, we listened to it together, danced to that beat, or shared a lyric.
Or for instance, a word…someone utters it innocently and suddenly my mind is flooded with his face.

A while back, I wrote of the advantages of friend zone over boyfriends. I was complacent, naive maybe, of the power of honest-to-God, no-walls friendship. It affects the heart. Makes you experience intimacy. Emotional intimacy. That is how I fell for my best guy friend. I fell for my Tim. And it sucks coz he didn’t fall for me.


The recurring thought in my mind is “how could he not see it?”. In my head, we’re perfect for each other. We just fit like a jigsaw puzzle. I get him and he gets me. Unless I imagined it all. Was I delusional in my musings that we would conquer the world with our combined power of honesty and mutual respect for each other? Did I really just conjure it all up?

Or maybe he just doesn’t see me that way…like a potential girlfriend. And that hurts the most. Like it’s an inconceivable notion for him to be attracted to me. Am I not good enough?
So many questions. So much sadness. The worst part is that I lost two things: a friend, and a possible future with said friend. Maybe it’s my fault, maybe I should have kept my heart in check. But in hindsight, considering all the late night chats and the shared dreams, did I ever stand a chance?

Till next time,


The tragedy of a lonely heart


I lie awake dissecting all the moments we had…over and over again with painstaking detail. And for a moment the pain goes and in its place, the love that I so foolishly thought we shared consumes me.

And then I remember. You love her. Not me. Even though I’ve been here from the start. I’ve always been here. Did you not see me standing here all this time?

Moments of Emotion

You know that feeling…That feeling when you’re listening to a song, whether it be a favourite or an ear filler, and then the singer croons a certain line or lyric, that makes you just close your eyes because your mind is suddenly flooded with memories of a certain time in your life, whether past or present. Yes, that feeling…well, that happens to me a lot. I sometimes listen to a song simply because it evokes memories and thoughts of a person, a place, a time or an adventure…

I therefore decided to share these moments with the blogosphere. These specific words encased in melodies that make me smile, laugh, feel like crying and everything in between. In no particular order, here are some of my favourite lyrics. Enjoy..

The smartest thing I’ve ever learned, is that I don’t have all the answers” ~ Emphasis by Sleeping At Last

Don’t run, just stop holding your tongue. Maybe there’s a way out of the cage where you live. Maybe one of these days you can let the light in. Show me how big your brave is” ~ Brave by Sara Bareilles

When all you wanted was to be wanted, wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now” ~ Fifteen by Taylor Swift

Please don’t be in love with someone else. Please don’t have somebody waiting on you” ~ Enchanted by Taylor Swift

All the times I let you in, just for you to go again” ~ The Last Time by Taylor Swift (feat. Gary Lightbody)

Life makes love hard” ~ Ours by Taylor Swift

Sometimes in our lives, we all have pain, we all have sorrow. But if we are wise, we know that there’s always tomorrow” ~ Bill Withers

I’ll come around if you ever wanna be in love. I’m not waiting, but I’m willing if you call me up. If you ever wanna be in love, I’ll come around” ~ If You Ever Want To Be In Love by James Bay

So come on let it go, just let it b. Why don’t you be you, and I’ll be me. Everything’s that’s broke, leave it to the breeze. Why don’t you be you, and I’ll be me” ~ Let It Go by James Bay

I used to recognize myself. It’s funny how reflections change” ~ Let It Go by James Bay

Too many shadows in my room, too many hours in this midnight, too many corners in my mind, so much to do to set my heart right.” ~ In Repair by John Mayer

Home – the world tried to break me, I found a road to take me, Home – there ain’t nothing but a blue sky now. After all of my running, I’m finally coming… Home” ~ Coming Home by Gwyneth Paltrow

I know a girl. She puts the color inside of my world. But she’s just like a maze, where all of the walls all continually change. And I’ve done all I can, to stand on her steps with my heart in my hands. Now I’m starting to see, maybe it’s got nothing to do with me
Fathers, be good to your daughters, daughters will love like you do. Girls become lovers who turn into mothers, so mothers, be good to your daughters too.” ~ Daughters by John Mayer

Something always brings me back to you. It never takes too long.” ~ Gravity by Sara Bareilles

What’s the greatest chapter in your book? Are there pages where it hurts to look? What’s the one regret you can’t work through? You got it baby, mine would be you” ~ Mine Would Be You by Blake Shelton

Riding in the car to work, and I’m trying to ignore the hurt. So I turned on the radio, Stupid song made me think of you. I listened to it for minute, but then I changed it. I’m getting a little bit stronger, just a little bit stronger.” ~ A Little Bit Stronger by Sara Evans/Leighton Meester

There’s one thing I want to say, so I’ll be brave. You were what I wanted, I gave what I gave, I’m not sorry I met you, I’m not sorry it’s over, I’m not sorry there’s nothing to say” ~ Your Ex-Lover Is Dead by the Stars

Take me into your loving arms
Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars
Place your head on my beating heart” ~ Thinking Out loud by Ed Sheeran

Love your curves and all your edges, all your perfect imperfections” ~ All of Me by John Legend

In this life, we all know, friends may come, and they may go. Through the years I know I will stay. And in the end I know that we’ll find, love so beautiful and divine” ~ Stay With You by John Legend


I could literally go on forever – I am a little bit of a music junkie. But I’m sure you’ll agree, that at one point or another, these words sang over a beat or a melody were all that you had when you were down in the dumps. Or when you felt so high that you had to sing at the top of the hills. Either way, they expressed and evoked emotion in you….like music does in all of us. Because music is pretty much universal.

Till next time,


PS. Please feel free to share your favourite lyrics in the comment section! I would love to read what music inspires you. Plus, I’m always scoping out for new music to add to my library 😉

Oven principles: how baking is like life

Okay. This post is inspired by the fact that I am currently baking a batch of (by the smell of things) very yummy cappuccino muffins. Yes people. Life’s good when there’s muffins involved. I’d post a picture later but I don’t have any icing sugar in the house and I can’t make them all pretty for the world to see. So, let’s just pretend the look like this…



So anyway. I am not kidding you but I had an absolutely profound moment while whipping up the said bunch of goodies. I don’t know about you but that’s either pretty epic or kinda weird. I promise you, I wasn’t high. I was standing there staring into the oven, and as I watched the little brown dollops of sugary sweetness rise, I thought of how a person can grow and mature from a little girl or boy with no direction or form, and transform into a well defined, scrumptious human being – just like that little muffin under my gaze.

You see, there’s the batter. Its comes with the usual – eggs, sugar, baking powder, flour, milk, chocolate chips etc. That folks, are the things that make up your life and majority of your childhood. There’s your education, which can be represented by the flour. It’s extensive and takes up pretty much the entire first quarter of your life so you know, the flour seemed to be the most approximate equivalent comparison.

Next, you get the sugar. The sugar can be the beautiful moments. The lovers, the friends, the highs and the slam dunks. Those are the moments that you look back upon in life and smile. That’s the sugar in your life.

Then there’s baking powder. It’s bitter to the taste and you don’t want too much of it in your batter (otherwise you get muffins that rise waay too much and you don’t want that). Baking powder can represent our mistakes in life. All the moments that made us cry – that left a bitter memory and maybe even a harsher consequence. But, when used in just the right amount, our mistakes can turn into learning lessons which make us grow and even rise to the occasion in any future challenges we may face.

And then – then we get the eggs. The eggs are our family. They hold everything together. Literally, eggs are used to ensure that the mixture combines well and holds. Kind of like the glue in our lives. You get a crappy glue, half the time you can get a crappy life. But, use fresh, great smelling eggs, and they are the key ingredients to a the perfect muffins. I know there’s people out there who got some rotten eggs dsyfuntional families in their mixture but still turned out alright. But, half the time, our families make or break us; most importantly, they hold us together when times get rough.

And finally, we get the milk. Milk, completes the batter and provides the solvent (for lack of a better word) that dissolves all these delicious goodies together. It can be seen as the extras in life. Those other experiences that occur and stay with you forever – whether it be a good Samaritan you met on the street, or that mural you saw on the chaotic graffiti filled walls down town and made you stop for a moment. Or, it’s the quiet moments. Those precious minutes that pass and in them you found reassurance, wisdom, laughter, wisdom, misery…anything.

All these things, when put together, make the creamy, rich batter that is our lives. They can come in different flavours, have different variations of ingredients. But at the end of the day, family, love, education, our mistakes and our experiences, shape us into the people that we are. They give us our flavour, our personality. They determine who we are and who we’ll become. How we’ll react to the external factors that life presents us.

And as we cook under that 220 degree heat that can sometimes be the trials we face, I hope and pray that you can remember the ingredients of the self and choose to rise to the occasion. Always.

Till next time,


PS. I know I forgot butter in the post but I honestly couldn’t come up with anything to compare butter to. Oops? Lol