Crawling in dark spaces

Today is one of those days. The ones that render me silent, listening to the inner turmoil within. I personally get lonely. Very lonely.

It’s exhausting to be alone. To have no one to smile at. To laugh with. What is it about having someone that makes life much more worth living? Is it that they’re there to share in your  happiness and your sadness? Or that you have someone to hold you when words aren’t enough.

It feels like I’m alone in this world. Like the people around me are living beside me but not with me. Maybe it’s the other way around. Maybe I’m the one retreating into myself and shutting off contact with those surrounding me. Either way, I can’t seem to find comfort in the presence of those close.

This echoing sadness, this pit in my stomach that seems to stretch upwards through the expanse of my chest – this needs more than a bowl of this ice cream and a good movie. This needs a friend. A lover. A mother or father. Funny thing is, technically speaking, I have all those people in my life.

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