3 reasons why I realised I don’t need to apologise to anyone for anything I do

I am currently going through a very big change in my life. As in, dropped-out-of-university-A-moved-to-university-B-and-changed-my-degree big.

Naturally, with such a change comes doubts, fears, worries and moments of sheer panic that make you want to curl up in a ball and hide in a very dark corner. Okay, maybe not a dark corner –  a bed would do just fine.

But seriously, I have been through a roller coaster of emotions in approximately 3 months. It has been exhausting, and damn near vomit inducing, with a touch of humour thrown in. It was particularly funny when one minute I was happy then I’d remember that I had some serious decisions to make about my future and I’d immediately break into a cold sweat.

Now, I am currently pursuing a Bachelors of Commerce, coming from a Bachelors of Engineering degree, at a university very close to home. I am assaulted greeted by the warm faces of my family every day and I admit, this isn’t as bad I imagined it would be (living at home, that is).

Now that the ordeal is over and I am forging this new path in my life, I find that I have to explain to the people around me why a) I am still home and haven’t flown the coop to Universirty A, and b) Why I decided to leave an incredibly prestigious degree choice when “I could have any job I wanted if I graduate with an engineering degree”.

When I reply with “I realised I didn’t want to do Engineering any more” or “I want something different with my life” I am totally taken aback by the look of short circuits going off in said person’s brain.

It took me a while before I learned to control the urge of immediately launching into a lecture of how even an engineering graduate is not guaranteed job security and besides, shouldn’t we study what we want to do and not what will get us a job? I have now come to the following three revelations that I wish I didn’t have to go through an early-life crisis to learn. However, it’s better late than never right?

1. I need to make choices for myself

I realise that from a lot of people’s point of view, it doesn’t seem like the right decision to make right now BUT it’s the right decision for me.

2. Passion trumps logic

The truth is, I am not cut out to be an engineer (or anything in the science related field for that matter). It doesn’t mean that I can’t be one if I sacrificed a heard of goats to an obscure deity tried hard enough. But honestly, I am more inclined to the none analytical sciences. I own a blog for crying out loud! What engineering student do you know that owns a blog? (I realise that I am heavily stereotyping engineering students but work with me here)

3. The future is never certain so why worry about it so much

This was the biggest point that really drove home after a whole lot of hair pulling and hyperventilating. I have my ENTIRE life ahead of me and that’s what matters. I am ready to put the past behind and work towards what I can change – my future.

So I took a couple of U-turns, got lost for a bit and stopped for a doughnut. Sue me.

So I took a couple of U-turns, got lost for a bit and stopped for a doughnut. Sue me.

Till next time,

Linet

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2 thoughts on “3 reasons why I realised I don’t need to apologise to anyone for anything I do

  1. Pingback: I AM SO THANKFUL! And so embarrassed *hides* | Loquacious Living

  2. Pingback: The Four Letter Word | Loquacious Living

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